Friends of Athens,
Today, mankind has aspired toward new, startling and gradiose achievements. My work--the sweat of my brow, the fruit of my labor--is available for preorder on Amazon.com. But when, you ask, will I need to occupy myself in the study of Russian? I recommend that you remain at all times vigilant--the threat of communism lurks behind every corner, growing like a mold in the refrigerator-like minds of every desperate anarchist. Will you suffer your children the fate of living in a despotic nation? I dare say, no! Learn Russian. Arm yourselves! Preorder now!